Arc 10, Part 9: "Crybaby"

—Felix Argyle.

Subaru knew that was the real name of the person standing before him. He had heard it from others, and more importantly, the person himself had just introduced himself as such. Despite his dainty appearance, Subaru had once thought the name had a masculine ring to it. However, even facing him as he claimed that name, Subaru couldn't quite reconcile the fact with the reality before his eyes.

That was how much the man's way of life was built upon the image of the nickname "Ferris."

"Dismissed as a knight...? You mean..."

"It means I quit. Well, it couldn't be helped, could it? I knew this would happen the moment I decided to take the hand of the 'Dragon Church' to save Crusch-sama. —Ah, Emilia-sama, please don't feel responsible for this."

"Ferris..."

"It was truly encouraging that you came for us back then. Knowing there were people besides me, Old Man Vil, and Crusch-sama’s allies who were happy for her safety... it made me feel like what I did wasn't a mistake."

Folding the cat ears atop his head, Ferris replied with a downward cast of his eyes. Emilia, who had stopped mid-stride while rushing toward him, moved her hands up and down as if struggling to find the right words to say. Hesitation and confusion—Emilia’s reaction was justified. However, seeing Ferris in his tailcoat, claiming he had abandoned his knighthood, Subaru’s response was different.

"Wait! Subaru-kun, where do you think you're going?"

"—Tch, it’s obvious. I'm going to Crusch-san’s place. This is going too far."

Grit-toothed, Subaru raised his voice as he was called back just as he was about to turn on his heel. He could guess the circumstances. To remove the 'Dragon’s Blood' eroding Crusch’s body and end her suffering, they had sought the help of the 'Dragon Church.' As a result, the Crusch camp’s standing in the Royal Selection had become precarious. And that was a decision Ferris had made in place of the delirious Crusch.

By Ferris's judgment, Crusch was saved, but her path to victory in the Royal Selection became grueling. It must have been a decision Crusch—who had a powerful motivation to become King—would never have wanted.

"But you did all of that for Crusch-san’s sake! And yet, for her to fire you... that’s just wrong!"

"Subaru!"

Beatrice cried out as Subaru shook off her hand. But Subaru didn't stop. He intended to run back to the Karsten estate and confront Crusch directly to make her retract Ferris’s dismissal. However, his first step was blocked by someone standing with arms spread wide—Rem.

"Rem, don't stop me. I don't want you guys to see me shouting like an emotional wreck."

"If you're self-aware enough to know you're being excessively emotional, then stop right there. Besides, before you go on a rampage, why don't you take a proper look at the other person's face?"

"The other person's face?"

Rem nodded and jerked her chin, halting Subaru’s impulsive momentum. Following her gesture, Subaru turned back. He saw Emilia and Beatrice looking at him with concern, and beyond them, he saw Ferris looking down at him from the entrance of the mausoleum. Ferris, the very source of Subaru’s anger, looked at Subaru’s outburst with an exasperated expression. He first turned his gaze toward Rem.

"Thanks, Rem-chan... This is the first time I've seen you up and walking, but you're a much better girl than I thought. Is it just your taste in boys that's lacking?"

"...I've heard that you took care of me while I was asleep, Ferris-san. Since you are my benefactor, I will answer modestly... but that was a terrible misunderstanding."

"I see. If that's your stance, Rem-chan, then fine. But I'm glad you're awake."

Rem and Ferris exchanged words across Subaru, who stood between them. Rem pursed her lips in a complex expression, and Ferris shifted gears with a "So." He narrowed his eyes, looking down at Subaru.

"Subaru-kun, you really are arrogant, aren't you?"

"Arro—..."

"I'm choosing my words carefully because I don't think 'self-centered' is quite right. You don't do everything for yourself; you do it for someone else, but you do it with such momentum that it ends up being counterproductive—or rather, unwanted meddling."

"You, saying it like that..."

"—And, if Subaru-kun is arrogant, then I suppose I'm arrogant too."

In an instant, seeing that smile, Subaru felt as if he had been doused with cold water.

"————"

He caught his breath, staring back at Ferris, who had insulted himself just as much as he had insulted Subaru. Ferris’s aura hadn't changed since he first noticed them at the mausoleum; he felt elusive, or perhaps too composed for Subaru to grasp. It was like a serene, calm sea. —But that couldn't be right. Considering what had happened to him, he should be in the midst of a raging storm, not a calm sea.

Subaru strained his eyes, trying to find a sign of the storm within Ferris’s expression. But Ferris, seemingly uninterested, closed one eye and let out an "Ah."

"I know. If you'd like, Emilia-sama and the others, why don't you come pay your respects?"

"Pay our respects... you mean, the mausoleum behind you? We can go in?"

"Yes, I have the key from the administrator. Besides, I have the status of a proxy, so I come here quite often."

"A proxy...?"

"Wow, Subaru-kun, you really are ignorant. If you keep acting like the 'Number One Knight' while knowing so little, you'll bring shame to Emilia-sama, you know?"

Ferris chuckled and stuck out his tongue, leaving Subaru speechless. It wasn't just being called out for his ignorance; the fact that the term "Number One Knight" came out of Ferris’s mouth felt like an incredibly delicate topic given the current situation. Of course, Ferris, with his mischievous eyes, had likely said it on purpose.

Toying with Subaru and the others in that manner, Ferris gently placed his hand on the closing door of the mausoleum he had just exited.

"Let's talk more inside. —I was just thinking His Highness might be lonely if it was only me visiting."

Within the Royal Cemetery, the presence of that mausoleum stood distinctly apart from the others. Constructed from white marble selected from across the kingdom and adorned with dragon motifs—the symbol of the Dragon Kingdom—the building possessed a prestige that overwhelmed anyone who looked upon it. Its outer walls, reflecting the sunlight, radiated a divinity that seemed to repel anything evil. The dragon statues, which formed a single image when the doors were closed, seemed to guard the dignity of the deceased royalty.

Stepping inside, one found the tomb markers of the sleeping royalty along the white corridors. The stone coffins, arranged in an orderly fashion, were decorated with carvings and ornaments associated with each royal member, making their lives seem to rise before one's eyes. The tomb of the Fourth Prince, their destination, felt particularly poignant.

"This is His Highness’s... Fourier Lugnica-sama’s grave."

Leading them across the polished floor, Ferris stopped and pointed to a particularly prominent tomb—the stone coffin of Fourier Lugnica. Within the mausoleum, protected by strict and quiet order, that logic wavered slightly here. After all, the Fourth Prince’s tomb was far too colorful for a place where the dead slept.

"Are these offerings? Letters, knitting, even wooden animals..."

"None of them feel like offerings for royalty, do they? Actually, the children who asked for these to be offered were far removed from the etiquette of the upper class, so it couldn't be helped."

"From people far removed... you mean, gifts from common citizens? Don't things like that get censored or confiscated at the gate?"

"Of course, they wouldn't let them through if it was a prank. But I made sure that wasn't the case when I received them as his proxy."

Crouching before the stone coffin, Ferris narrowed his eyes at the various items. The items offered there were likely prepared with the heartfelt feelings of those who adored the Fourth Prince, regardless of their status. A proxy was someone granted the right, as an exception and with the administrator's permission, to bring such offerings on behalf of those who could not visit the site directly. Ferris had been entrusted with the feelings of the people as the proxy for this Fourth Prince.

"Originally, the Lugnica royalty were all kind-hearted—or rather, many were gentle and good at being pampered—but Fourier-denka was exceptionally bright and had a fun personality. He used to sneak out of the castle all the time to play with the people of the capital."

"...That's amazing. It sounds like an episode from a manga. But in reality, doing that would cause a huge problem, wouldn't it?"

"Well, it did. The Imperial Knights would be mobilized to search for the missing Prince. In the end, he’d be found joining a soup kitchen in the slums, and since it was a 'Dragon Church' soup kitchen, it almost caused friction between the castle and the Church. It was a huge fuss."

"That’s a joke that’s hard to laugh off right now."

Subaru looked at Fourier’s tomb, loved by so many, over Ferris’s hunched back. Ferris’s nostalgic storytelling, laced with smiles, was filled with an undeniable affection for the protagonist of his tale. Even from these fragments, one could feel his personality was one loved by everyone.

"...Did I mention His Highness to Subaru-kun before?"

"...Yeah, that there was someone like that, and that he was close to you and Crusch-san. Did you also say that he and I were a bit alike?"

"Hah? Why would His Highness and Subaru-kun be alike? I'll kill you."

"You said the exact same thing back then too!!"

Subaru hurriedly defended himself as Ferris’s voice took on a seriously dangerous edge. In truth, what Subaru had been told about Fourier was limited to that. Of course, even Subaru, slow as he was, could guess that the man's death was not unrelated to Crusch’s motivation to participate in the Royal Selection.

"Then, did Crusch-san join the Royal Selection for Prince Fourier’s sake?"

"...As expected of Emilia-sama. You dive straight into the difficult questions."

"Ah, I'm sorry. But you invited us to pay our respects because you wanted to talk about it, right? I wanted to hear it before I decided what to do next."

"What to do next? What does that mean?"

"Yes, Subaru beat me to it earlier, but I was thinking of going to Crusch-san to ask her to reconsider. Subaru and I will talk to her with all our might. How about it?"

"I think it's a good idea. ...Ow, ow, ow!"

"Don't speak on impulse. Do you know where we are?"

The moment Subaru agreed with Emilia, Rem pinched his side, making him writhe. Seeing them like that, Ferris stood up with a bitter smile.

"As I said before, I want you to stop going to Crusch-sama to say this and that. I did what I did knowing it would turn out like this from the start."

"But...!"

"I've made my peace with it. I said I was dismissed, but I was the one who said I no longer had the right to be by her side. Besides..."

Putting a finger to his lips, Ferris paused. He then pointed his finger at Emilia, then at Subaru in turn.

"If someone—Emilia-sama, the 'Council of Sages,' or whoever—told you to reconsider your master-servant relationship with Subaru-kun from the outside, what would you do?"

"Eh? My relationship with Subaru is something I thought long and hard about before deciding. So, if someone said that to me, I'd feel really uneasy and wonder what they were thinking... Ah."

"That's exactly it. What Emilia-sama is trying to do right now."

An unnecessary, oversized meddling by an outsider. Having it explained so clearly by Ferris, Emilia’s shoulders slumped visibly. Facing that reaction, Subaru felt little joy in the fact that Emilia didn't want anyone interfering in their relationship. More than anything, the persuasion was effective not just on Emilia, but on Subaru as well.

Ferris, who surely knew this, shrugged at Subaru over the dejected Emilia.

"To answer your earlier question, Crusch-sama isn't someone with such narrow vision. So, Fourier-denka is only one part of the reason she joined the Royal Selection."

"...But it’s not a part small enough to ignore, is it?"

"My, you've gotten good at nitpicking. You've lost all your cuteness, Subaru-kun."

That said, Ferris didn't seem particularly stung and continued.

"I won't deny it. His Highness’s death was a truly massive event for Crusch-sama... and for me. We were deeply hurt, and we cried enough for a lifetime. Well, I'm a crybaby, so I cried a lot after that too."

"————"

"Crusch-sama didn't show it outwardly, but she suffered and suffered. —But what hurt Crusch-sama the most was what happened after His Highness passed away."

"Eh..."

"His Highness and the other royals passed away one after another, and everyone was in a panic. Crusch-sama, as Duchess Karsten, participated in the castle meetings as one of the high nobles... and she realized it then. Everyone in the meeting was more worried about the possibility of the covenant with the 'Holy Dragon' being severed than they were about the fact that His Highness and the others had died."

His voice was quiet, carefully controlled to keep emotion out of it. But that effort only highlighted the grotesqueness of the facts Ferris was recounting. One could see how much the Lugnica royalty were loved and how full of warmth they were just by looking at this mausoleum; every tomb besides Fourier Lugnica’s had offerings praying for the peace of the deceased.

And yet, even the deaths of such beloved people were trivialized before the covenant with the 'Dragon.'

"So that's why."

The words escaped Emilia like a sigh, as she reached the same understanding as Subaru. She placed a hand on her chest, her amethyst eyes narrowing with pain.

"That's why Crusch-san decided that when she became King, she wouldn't have a country that relied entirely on the covenant with the 'Dragon,' but a stronger one."

"—That's not the only reason, but yes."

"Not the only reason...?"

"Crusch-sama hated it. ...The thought that if she hadn't been close to Fourier-denka, she surely would have thought the same way as everyone else."

That was something she couldn't have known unless it actually happened, and since it couldn't happen, it was no reason for Crusch to blame herself. No matter how she struggled, Crusch met Fourier and reached that conclusion. Hating a version of herself that didn't exist would only bring pain.

However, while thinking that, Subaru realized that the situation Crusch was in wasn't simply a matter of making a choice that contradicted her claims in the Royal Selection.

Crusch, who declared she would end the covenant with the 'Dragon,' had been saved by the power of a sacrament from the 'Dragon Church,' which worshipped that very 'Dragon.' —But that wasn't all.

"Crusch-san vowed to restore an environment where the Lugnica royalty... where Prince Fourier would be truly mourned, and she was trying to fulfill that, but now she can't."

"...And the 'Dragon Church' didn't save His Highness. Even though they saved Crusch-sama."

"—!"

Ferris’s raspy words struck Subaru and the others to their core. Until a moment ago, Subaru had been fully intent on going to protest that Crusch was going too far by dismissing Ferris, even considering her poor mental and physical state. But now that he knew the weight of the resolve and determination Crusch carried, the ideals and vows she held, and how they had been shattered in the worst possible way, what could Subaru possibly say to her?

If only Subaru could have offered an arm or a leg to take on Crusch’s curse instead—

"That's why I said Subaru-kun is arrogant."

"Wha..."

"Anyone can tell just by looking at your face. No wonder Beatrice-chan can't let go of your hand. And while that might be slightly better, you know it wouldn't solve anything, right?"

Ferris tilted his head, his tone like that of a parent lecturing a child, rebuking the shallowness of Subaru’s thinking in a non-emotional way. Subaru knew. His current thought was an empty theory, and as Ferris said, it was meaningless. Even if the person saving her had been Natsuki Subaru, the knight of Emilia, instead of the 'Dragon Church,' the failure of Crusch relying on an opposing camp to solve her own problem would remain. And that was an incredibly large disadvantage in the Royal Selection, which had passed its midpoint.

"Solving your own problems by dumping them on others... that's a failure even before talking about being a King, huh..."

"—. That's harsh. But that's how it is."

"...It's a borrowed sentiment."

It was a sentiment he had heard from none other than Crusch herself. Back when the Witch Cult targeted Emilia and Subaru had begged Crusch for help without any bargaining chips, Crusch had rejected Subaru’s ugly plea with dignified coldness. That was a lesson Subaru needed to learn. That was why he didn't resent Crusch for it. He didn't resent her, yet for it to be flipped back on her like this was too cruel an irony.

"Hey, Ferris, I don't know if I should ask this, but..."

Emilia spoke up to Ferris in place of the downcast, speechless Subaru. She stepped up beside Ferris and stood before Fourier Lugnica’s tombstone, looking at the many offerings placed there. Then, she gripped the magic crystal on her chest and closed her eyes. Behind her, Beatrice and Rem also lined up, offering their own prayers for the deceased. Finishing her prayer, Emilia looked at a particularly vibrant bouquet—the one Ferris had just adjusted, which he had surely brought himself—and asked.

"Did Crusch-san and Prince Fourier love each other?"

"————"

At that question, Ferris’s eyes widened slightly before he gave a small laugh. And then—

"I can't say something like that. —It would be far too tactless."

The mausoleum doors closed with a heavy thud, and Subaru’s eyes met the dragon carved into the double doors. He knew it was modeled after the 'Holy Dragon' Volcanica, as seen on coins and sculptures, but after hearing the tragic love story surrounding Crusch and Prince Fourier, his feelings toward that 'Holy Dragon' had become more complex than ever.

"I met the real thing on top of the tower, but being told it's the object of the kingdom's covenant and the Dragon Church's faith while it's in that empty-headed state... it's not very convincing..."

"Maybe it's the type that snaps to attention when necessary, I suppose. Otherwise, it moves on energy-saving mode, like Otto when he has no work, in fact."

"No matter how much work Otto doesn't have, calling him empty-headed is going too far. ...Wait, since the comparison is the 'Holy Dragon,' would it be an honor for a citizen of the kingdom?"

At Beatrice’s suggestion, Subaru tried to simulate an 'Otto-Dragon' in his mind, but since Otto becomes an idiot from the sense of liberation after finishing work, he couldn't get a very helpful opinion. Moderation in heavy drinking is key. Anyway—

"Ferris, what are you going to do after this?"

"After this?"

"Yes. I mean, you can't go back to Crusch-san’s place right now... it would be hard to go back, wouldn't it? You've lived in the same mansion all this time, so do you have anywhere to go?"

As they were on their way to return the mausoleum key to the administrator, Emilia asked that question. Ferris scratched his cheek with a finger, looking troubled and hesitant to answer. From that reaction, Emilia’s point had clearly hit home. Most likely, Wilhelm’s decision to tell Subaru and the others where Ferris was had been a painful one made out of concern for his future.

No matter the circumstances, Crusch and Ferris had severed their master-servant relationship. In such a situation, Wilhelm, as Crusch’s servant, could not act against his master’s intentions. Having someone he trusted check on Ferris’s wellbeing was the maximum consideration Wilhelm could show in that situation. And if they were to respond to Wilhelm’s consideration to the fullest—

"Emilia-tan is saying this: why don't you come to our place for a while?"

"Yes, exactly! What do you think? Of course, I'm not saying forever. It would be sad to say goodbye like this, and I think there are times when you just need time. It took me about a hundred years to accept that I had frozen everyone in my hometown, you know."

"I think that's a bit too long-term, though."

"By the way, it took Betty four hundred years to accept Subaru’s love, in fact."

"I think that's a bit too pitiful even for this guy, though."

Because of the misleading comments from the long-lived duo, Emilia and Beatrice, Rem began to look at Subaru with slightly pitying eyes. He’d have to clear up that misunderstanding later, but at the very least, the proposal to Ferris was sincere. However, Ferris put a hand to his forehead and said, "Taha—"

"I had a feeling you might say that, but you actually did. I know I'm a talented and skilled healer, so I get why everyone wants me."

"Mu, I'm not saying this as a joke..."

"Yes, yes, of course, I know Emilia-sama is always serious. I'm happy you're inviting me like that. Truly."

"...But, with that way of answering..."

"—That's right. It's a kind offer, but I can't say yes."

Ferris shook his head slowly with a bitter smile, declining Emilia’s proposal. Subaru felt a strong urge to press him further, but he also understood why he couldn't agree. Because—

"Even if we're apart, I still cherish Crusch-sama. Even if my judgment made the Royal Selection hopeless, I can't just flip a switch and start supporting someone other than Crusch-sama."

"Y-You can even hate me. I just want to know that you're okay and not wandering off somewhere, Ferris."

"I won't hate you. —Ah, that's a lie. I do hate you after all. I've hated you, Emilia-sama, from the very, very, very beginning."

"Eh! Really!?"

Emilia, who had gone so far as to offer an unfitting compromise, was shocked. Ferris nodded "Yes" to her and gestured toward them with the mausoleum key.

"It's not just Emilia-sama. I hated all the Royal Selection candidates besides Crusch-sama, and their knights too. I hate Beatrice-chan, and I hate Rem-chan even though we've barely met. I really hate Subaru-kun."

"The way you said that makes it sound like I'm the only one you genuinely hate..."

"What makes you think I don't genuinely hate you?"

Being told that, Subaru was silenced, unable to say anything back.

"...Are your feelings really not going to change?"

Even Emilia could tell that Ferris’s "hate" wasn't his true feeling. He was using likes and dislikes as a reason to refuse her proposal. He was saying that no matter what was said to him, no matter how he was treated, his feelings of supporting Crusch would never change.

"Please don't worry so much. I don't know if I'll continue with the Imperial Knights, so I'll consult the Captain, but I'm in high demand at clinics and everywhere else."

"...You're not going to do anything desperate, are you?"

"Desperate? You mean, like despairing of the world and ending my life? Me, the person who hates death more than anyone in this world?"

"—. My bad."

Subaru apologized to Ferris, who had asserted that with zero trace of his joking atmosphere. Even if he left Crusch’s side, Ferris would not abandon his identity as 'Blue' and a healer. Subaru decided to believe that.

"Ah—but! It's frustrating! I can't say anything to Crusch-san, and if I can't even take Ferris in temporarily, there's nothing I can do...!"

"Weren't you just scolded by Ferris-san for that being arrogant?"

"Oh, right, right, just like Rem-chan says."

"But, Rem..."

"—. No matter what, there are problems that only the parties involved can solve."

Observing a tragedy of misunderstandings yet having no right to correct it. To Subaru, who voiced that frustration, Rem lowered her eyes and let out a small sigh.

"Just as outsiders cannot interfere in the master-servant relationship between you and Emilia-san, or the contract between you and Beatrice-chan. Just as between you and me..."

"Rem?"

"...What kind of relationship is there between you and me? What are you to me?"

"Don't suddenly snap back to reality! You, me, important!"

"We feel the same way! We, Rem, very, very important!"

"—. Thank you, Emilia-san."

"What about me!?"

His very existence was brushed aside, and Rem gracefully ignored Subaru, whose voice had cracked. Behind their exchange, Beatrice called out to Ferris with a "Hey." She kept a small grip on the hem of Subaru’s clothes.

"Betty isn't as worried about your future as Subaru and the others. But Betty owes you a massive debt, I suppose."

"Beatrice-chan-sama owes me? Did I have a favor with a Great Spirit?"

"You saved Subaru when his gate was about to break from overexertion. Unfortunately, Subaru ignored your warning and broke his gate anyway, but it bought him time, in fact. Without your power, the contract between Betty and Subaru wouldn't have happened, I suppose."

"E-Eh, that's more pleasing than I thought."

"Savor it to your heart's content, in fact. And Betty is the type who always pays back her debts. So, if anything happens to you, Betty will always be your strength, I suppose."

"Even if Subaru-kun is about to fall off a cliff?"

"I'll pick up Subaru first, then rush to you at full speed, in fact."

With her hands on her hips and a proud huff, Beatrice answered. Ferris’s eyes widened slightly, and he covered his mouth with his hand, letting out an "Aha." The urge to laugh grew stronger, and soon, a teardrop appeared at the corner of Ferris’s eye.

"Ah—no, don't. Don't make me cry, Beatrice-chan-sama."

"You're a crybaby, just as you said yourself, I suppose."

At Beatrice’s words, Ferris’s smile broke into a small, genuine laugh.

"If you change your mind, come visit anytime, okay? I'll tell everyone to make sure someone always answers! It's a promise, okay? Can you keep a promise, Ferris?"

"A stray bullet hit me!"

"It was appropriate."

Until the very last moment of their parting, Emilia and the others had tried their best to invite him. He knew there was no malice or ulterior motive, and repeatedly refusing made him feel guilty for clouding Emilia’s face, but it couldn't be helped.

"It's not that I have anything against Emilia-sama and the others, though."

Even if he had let go of the title himself, Ferris was Crusch’s knight. He could not allow himself, even temporarily, to take shelter under the umbrella of another Royal Selection candidate. If anyone found out, it would lead to bad rumors about Crusch, and more than anything, he was afraid of what Crusch would think.

"...In that regard, His Highness was amazing. Weren't you ever afraid?"

In the mausoleum, before the tombstone and stone coffin, he had intended to confess as much as time allowed. Yet, even after a short while, lingering regrets he wanted someone to hear would well up again. Fretting and fretting, even after switching his attire to masculine clothing, the effeminacy at his core wouldn't peel away. He truly disgusted himself. If there was one thing he could think he had made the right decision on—

"I'm glad I was the one to say it first."

As he had told Emilia and the others, the dismissal as a knight was something Ferris had brought up himself. The moment he decided to accept the hand of the 'Dragon Church' and use the power of the Sacrament of Philore, he had prepared himself to lose the right to be by Crusch’s side. However, Ferris’s soul could not simply sit and wait for those words to come from Crusch’s mouth. So he brought it up first, avoiding making Crusch be the one to cut him off. —Wait, he had tried to praise his right decision, but it was just another manifestation of the effeminacy he hated.

"I'm nothing but a liar..."

He thought he had made the right decision. A lie. He asked if Fourier wasn't afraid. A lie. He said he had nothing against Emilia and the others. A lie.

The dismissal was to protect his own fragile heart, and he knew that even Fourier had to summon all his courage whenever he invited Crusch somewhere. And he couldn't possibly feel nothing about the rapid progress of Emilia and the others—who had achieved numerous feats from an initially overwhelming disadvantage and were greatly troubling the high nobles due to her half-elf heritage—and especially the success of Subaru, who was in the same position as a knight.

In fact, Ferris hadn't asked Subaru about the situation with his ungloved right hand. The fact that Subaru hadn't brought it up himself meant it was likely a method that would be difficult to use for Crusch’s treatment. But a guess was just a guess. He hadn't confirmed it. The reason was clear: he had run away from the possibility that there might have been an answer other than relying on the 'Dragon Church.'

It felt as if he was prioritizing running away from pain in everything he did.

"Do I really... cherish anyone...?"

If he truly cherished that person, shouldn't he have cherished their unyielding feelings? If he was in a position to know the prayer Crusch vowed before Fourier’s grave, shouldn't he have searched for a path where her wish wouldn't be severed, even if she continued to suffer from unhealing pain? Wasn't it the anger from facing an unacceptable reality that made Crusch remember Fourier and made her realize the heartlessness of Ferris’s actions?

If the confusion in Crusch’s 'memories' as she remembered Fourier Lugnica was triggered by anger toward Ferris’s actions that trampled upon her vow... Ferris might be hated not just by Crusch, but by Fourier as well.

"—Tch, stop, stop. This is pointless."

He realized he was once again looking for words to comfort himself under the guise of self-reproach. If he had time to waste on such trivial things, he had to determine his future position so as not to worry Emilia and the others, or Wilhelm, whom he had put in a bind between himself and Crusch.

In truth, he had lost his reason to continue as a knight. Since the title of 'Blue' was still intact, he would be more than welcome if he went to a clinic or a magic research institute. Securing a job would be easy, but just spending his days aimlessly would be meaningless. While continuing to save others with these healing hands was a necessity, he had other desires.

Even if he—no, Felix Argyle—had thrown away the right to desire them.

"—Ah, good. I was worried we might miss each other."

Suddenly, on his way back from the cemetery, as he stared at the cobblestones of the noble district, Ferris’s ears twitched and trembled at the sound of a voice calling out to him. He stopped and looked forward. A single person was standing in the middle of the road. —A familiar face.

A man with dull blonde hair and deep blue eyes. He was tall and slender, dressed in a well-tailored suit, with his hair and goatee neatly groomed, exuding a sophisticated aura. Given the man's profession, that was not strange at all. After all, the person was—

"—Russell Fellow, right? You're from the Merchants' Guild."

"Yes, that is correct. I am deeply honored that you remember me. On our side, should I address you as Ferris-sama? Or Felix-sama?"

"...Either is fine, whichever you like."

"Then, I shall take you up on that and call you Felix-sama. Due to the nature of my profession, it is more convenient to call someone by their formal name rather than a nickname to avoid any complications."

"Hmph."

Ferris closed one eye at the man—Russell Fellow—who bowed with polite movements. The man was the representative of the capital's Merchants' Guild, a shrewd individual famous for being exceptionally talented even among the battle-hardened merchants of the capital. In fact, he had lent his help with supplies and transport during the White Whale subjugation, so he was not a stranger to the Crusch camp.

"Even so, I can't take any business deals right now. Sorry, but..."

"You have terminated your master-servant contract with Duchess Karsten. Yes, I am aware."

"...Your ears are scary fast."

Ferris regretted his foolish way of starting the conversation. Because Russell was clearly lying in wait for him. That had never happened before, so if he was doing it today of all days, it was because a reason to take such action had arisen. And there was one more foolish thing he was late to notice.

"...This road, it's still evening, but why is no one passing by?"

"————"

Russell stood in the middle of the road, about ten meters away from Ferris. There was no sign of anyone else approaching the street in the noble district, neither around Russell nor around Ferris. This might be possible in the middle of the night or early morning, but it was impossible at a time when the sun hadn't fully set. And when the impossible happens, there is always a reason. In this case, the reason was being caused by—

"Felix-sama, there is something I would very much like to discuss with you. If you would like, may I invite you to dinner at my home? If you haven't decided on your destination yet."

"Are you trying to recruit me now that my collar is off? Sorry, but that talk is—"

"—No, it is not a recruitment. Actually, the talk is mandatory."

Russell shook his head slowly, as if lamenting. —In that instant, a cold blade was pressed against Ferris’s slender neck by someone who had appeared directly behind him.

"—!"

Ferris gasped, his movements sealed. It happened so fast he couldn't do anything. All he knew was that the blade pressed against him was a thin, highly curved scimitar, and that the person standing behind him was considerably taller than him. —No, and one more thing.

"...You don't seem like just a merchant, do you?"

"I wonder. I would like to think so."

Russell closed the distance step by step. Ferris, unable to do anything with the blade at his neck, tried at least not to look away, and once again, he disgusted himself. How could he have assumed someone capable of such cold eyes was just an ordinary person?

He bit his lip hard, enduring so that no weakness or groans would escape. He told himself that was the most he could do right now. Looking at Ferris up close, Russell spoke with those same cold eyes.

"Now that you are no longer the Duchess's knight, I have no hesitation in interrogating you. You will tell me. —About the 'Sacrament of the Immortal King' passed down in the Argyle family."